Regarding 'Dads' ...

So ... Most of y'all don't know the continuing drama between me and my dad. I'll give you a super-duper-quick-recap:*

- my dad left my mom for another woman (who will here on in be referred to as 'Curse') when I was in grade three-ish.
- my dad always said horrible things to me about my mom, while my mom** tried not to let me and my sister get stuck in the middle.
- I was never good enough. If I got an 'A' in school, why wasn't it an 'A+'? and all that kind of bullshit.
- when I got pregnant my dad told me that I had to have an abortion or I would 'never amount to anything and I'd end up on welfare and be a loser for the rest of my life.'
- he persuaded me to sign over a bunch of tuition money to him so that he could get a tax break.
- I lived with him for a little bit (BIG MISTAKE) and when I moved out, him and Curse refused to let Jacob bring his toys with him. They also wrecked and/or sold some of my stuff.
- my dad let his stupid-ugly-fat wife key my car.

Now. This is clearly not everything that's happened. Truthfully, it's making my anger and anxiety shoot through the roof just thinking about him. Anyways, I haven't talked to him for more than a year and he called me on my birthday. I wrote him an email (so that I wouldn't get painted as the mean-daughter-who-never-talks-to-her-victim-of-a-dad to my grandparents) that said 'thanks for the message yesterday.' Now he wants to meet for coffee.

I have two reasons that I'd want to meet with him:
1. it would make my grandparents ceaselessly happy and proud of me and I wouldn't be seen as the mean-daughter-who-never-talks-to-her-victim-of-a-dad.
2. what if I got a present out of it?
But all in all, I really don't want to meet with him. At. All. I know that I'd have to buy my own coffee. And I know that I'd hear about how everyone thinks he's so great and he doesn't understand why my mom has 'brainwashed me.' And I know that I'd hear a million reasons from him why I'm the horrible daughter and how he's so upset that I 'treat him like this.' And I know that I'd leave crying.

What should I do, friends?


*disclaimer: I am well aware of the fact I am not a perfect daughter. I'm not blaming EVERYTHING on him.
**another disclaimer: I am also well aware of the fact that my mom is not a perfect mother. But she's amazing and wonderful and a helluva lot better than my dad.