not skywalker

my name is anika. a-nick-a. not a-neek-a ... and yes, people HAVE told me before that it's like annikin skywalker. but i'm not.

Monday, June 23, 2008

So's Your Face ...

When Jacob was six, one day I noticed that he had a sort of oval bruise on his forehead. Right smack dab in the middle. And when I asked him what happened to make that mark on his face? "Oh," he said nonchalantly, "I just put the vacuum on my forehead to see what it would do, and it kind of gave me a hickey."
It sure did.

So the other day when he had a little red sore mark on his cheek I immediately thought about the vacuum incident. Obviously now that he's nine the explanation would be more reasonable, no? "Well," he explained to me, "I was going to make eggs for breakfast, but I didn't remember if I had turned on the stove or not. So I touched the spatula to the element and then to my cheek to check."

So I guess the stove was on.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Dear Dad:

I was going to get you a Father's Day card, but I couldn't find any that said "Dad, you have been a poor excuse for a Father so I don't know why I should be celebrating you."

Sorry!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Luckier than the Average Duck ...

My sister and I had never been close -- we were five years apart growing up, and that five years became like a canyon that separated us and showed us how vastly different our experiences were of many things in our early life ... In the relationship we each had with our father, in the relationship each of us had with our step-dad, in the things we did in high school, in our choices, in our hurts, and in our accomplishments.

While I was struggling to keep my head above water when our father decided to leave our family, she was just learning the alphabet ...
While I was navigating the dangerous terrain of living between mom's and dad's, she seemed to be effortlessly bounced back and forth ...
While I tried to reconcile in my mind the longing for and hatred towards our father, she was going out for Beers (root beer) with our step-dad ...
She was still playing with Barbies when I had my first baby ...

It's not her fault, she was just younger and had extremely different experiences than I did. But understandably, this made it very difficult for us to see eye to eye, or to even relate to each other very much at all ...

Now that we have grown, now that we have healed, we are relating to each other in a way that I never thought was possible. It started in small steps, but now that she is getting married and I have had my second son, we are finding more and more that we have in common.
We have become friends and have found that we have a bond that only sisters can have.

She is my best friend and I love her so much. What a blessing a sister is.



How do people make it through life without a sister? ~Sara Corpening

Monday, June 09, 2008

Don't Be Part of the Problem; Be Part of the Solution!

My prob with Father's Day used to be that, well, I HATED all dads. Every single last one of them. Even the ones that looked like good ones, I knew were secretly bad.

But now?

Well, due to a revolution of sorts in my life, I have a different sort of problem. I have to fandangle celebrations for all of the dads in my life ... Don't I?

My husband -- the most wonderful and funny dad that I have ever known (and the most important one on this list fo sho)
My stepdad -- might as well be my real dad, he has turned out to be quite a good man and I love him dearly
My real dad -- the sort of dad no one wants to have. He's selfish and leaves a path of destruction everywhere he goes ...
My grandfather -- my real dad's dad ... Quite possibly the most amazing, patient, wonderful man in the world and I adore him.Joel's middle name is after him ...
My husband's dad -- a good one, and important on my list as well ...

So vot do I do?

Although I would definitely feel guilty ... I think I just want to ignore them all (except for a phone call of course, and maybe having them over some other time) ... And spend the whole day celebrating the fact that my darling husband, the father of my two beautiful boys and our family is my favorite little grouping of people that I have ever had the honor to be a part of ...

Friday, June 06, 2008

It's The Little Things ...

Like covering me with the blanket when you leave for work in the morning ...

Like massaging my neck when I have a migraine ...

Like just knowing sometimes that I feel overwhelmed and making me feel better ...

Like buying me flowers ...

Like calling me during the day to say that you love me ...

Like telling me I'm beautiful when I'm not wearing any makeup and my hair is just in a ponytail ...

Like thanking God for me when you pray ...

Like writing me lists ...

Like doing funny and ridiculous things just to make me laugh ...

Like taking Joel from me when he's fussing to give me a break ...

Like automatically putting on My Name Is Earl ...

Like organizing and unpacking when we just moved in ...


These things tell me that you love me.
And I love you right back more than you can even imagine.