I did it!

Well, I ate the sandwich with the past due mayonnaise ... And I'm still here. And so I'll wait. And while I wait, I'll leave you with this excerpt from Lemony Snicket's The Miserable Mill:

"'Optimist' is a word which here refers to a person who thinks hopeful and pleasant thoughts about nearly everything. For instance, if an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say, in a pleasant and hopeful voice, 'Well, this isn't too bad. I don't have my left arm anymore, but at least nobody will ever ask me whether I am right-handed or left-handed,' but most of us would say something more along the lines of 'Aaaaah! My arm! My arm!'"

*sigh* I just love these books!